Little Fascist and Spenard

Since moving to the new apartment we've gotten kittens. They've been a lot of fun, we had a small tragedy, but we've found that we really are cat people. Especially Little Fascist. All day he runs around chasing Fergus, Ilulissat, and Spenard. The only one that ever gets caught is Spenard. Poor thing, he's the youngest of the three, and so "He's a baby mommy, I hold him like a baby!" Fergus is entirely too large for him to carry, and is immune to this kind of annoyance, but LF has other tricks up his sleeve. Oh, yes! So poor Fergus (who only wants food, sleep, and lubbins) is subject to being laid on, pushed around, and prodded with plastic golf clubs. Ilulissat gets the least physical contact, because she gets clawsy. So they play with jingle balls, the plastic rings from milk jugs, and her catnip kite. Except when he manages to zip her into the beach cooler, hide her under a plastic box, and lock her in the cabinet. He's gotten a bit better, but good greif, it's taking a lot to get it through to him that he has to be careful. Any suggestions, oh great blogosphere?